Can you teach an Old Gill new tricks? Milan captain Pins Magee certainly seems to think so, after signing the journeyman pin toppler to a two year deal.

“Cat Daddy is coming. Claws out and ready for a puuurrrrrfect strike. Get ready for the 'mane' event.”

Andrew ‘The Cat Daddy’ Gillespie, known for his surgical accuracy and unquenchable thirst for lager, is thought to have been added as a rotation option to the Premier League club’s lineup following some time spent playing abroad in the Oxford Bowls Division 1.

When approached by Head of Recruitment and 4th ball Micky Big Time, it apparently didn’t take much coaxing for Gill to put pen to paper. Gillespie said, “I like bowling, I like pints, and I like patter. I’m struggling to get two of those things on a good day at Riders, and so the decision was an easy one.” Cat Daddy then went on to elaborate - “in case there was any confusion, I was commenting on the extremely low patter and pint drinking ability of the ROR. Frankly I think they are scum.” Magee has to be buoyed by this level of passion from his new man.

Magee will also likely be licking his lips at the impact Old Gill can bring on the lanes. Although plagued by injury, and more practically by the fact he lives in Oxford, Gillespie’s career numbers are nothing to be sniffed at consistently scoring in the 95-115 range and averaging a sizzling 9.7 patters per hour.

Magee commented - “The Cat Daddy has been on our radar for a while, and I know Pinter fans all over the world will be excited about seeing him in the black and blue. It really is just a case of getting him to the lane - if he can play, sparks are gonna fly.”

Gillespie will have his work cut out for him breaking into the starting 6, with Magee and co demonstrating consistency in their lineups all season, but it’s thought this move is for the locker room as much as it is for match day.

Pinter fans will no doubt be eagerly awaiting Gillespie's debut, but whether he clears his medical in time for June 6th is unclear. Stay tuned for updates.