A report by Gutther Bawl.

I was welcomed back into the Premier League Family last Thursday to cover what can only be described as an auspicious, yet poignant evening. The excitement I felt to be back in the rafters is exactly what I imagine losing your virginity feels like. One day.. I still hope..

Regardless, the cloud that hung over the league was the imminent departure of the league's very own Harry "Pins Magee" Magee.

Jetting off to the underside of the world, how he'll fare with upside down lanes and the heat is still to be determined. Nonetheless, if he brings the same leadership skills to the Australian people as he has to Pinter Milan over his near 2 year reign, it won't be long before the Australians unite under a Bowling Republic and jettison themselves from imperial pin-slapping.

Warm words were shared by all in regards to the Pinterman, his fellow captain Davy 2 shoes had (unsurprisingly) 2 attempts at an interview with me. Upon completion of the second interview, one passer-by commented, "if only he had fewer pairs, and more spares", wise words...wise words.

It's likely that 2 shoes was still reeling from the surprise that he wasn't as poor as he usually is. Either that, or it was the disappointment of being pipped by Pinter's Zlats for game 1 Pinsman. A masterful spare late in the 9th nicked the extra two points for his team, with a final 163 surpassing the well-heeled Rider by 10 pins.

The Swede carried the baton for Pinter in game 1, filling the wedge-shaped hole left by a misfiring Big Time. What followed were wild accusations that he is in fact half-robot. Bionic or not, BT certainly malfunctioned last week, and he left the arena to cries of "inspect the gadget"!

Investigations are ongoing, but it's likely this will be nothing more than the story of the "Wally who cried Wall-E".

In the Rider lanes this week there was a debutant with the potential for magic. It was sadly nothing more though, as the pressure of the occasion, and pints, got to him. His scores proving decidedly muggle-ish, on the night he was less "Harry Potter" and more "Harry Plopper".

A quiet night all round from the League's new boys, Pin City Rollers. Some solid, but ultimately unremarkable scores. Given their lightning start they can afford to coast for the rest of the season, and await dining on Silver come the close of proceedings.

Disappointment after disappointment continues for the Riders this season, a fall from grace rivalled only by Icarus. Who knows how they'll bring themselves back next season, but even Stevie Wonder could see there's precious little left for them this campaign.

There's no better way to wrap this report up, than to comment on the finish to Game 2. A story of the resilience of man, the joy of sport, and the bonds of friendship.

The night was wrapping up, another Pinter Milan whitewash in the books, and one man left to bowl. Like all great leaders, he comes up the rear.

With the ball in his hand, a guard of honour formed guiding him to the line, all competitors singing his song. The rest of Rowans fell still, and witnessed greatness.

A confident stride, a perfect release. Nothing audible but the roll of the ball.
They all muttered: "that looks good". And it was. Pins, all ten of them, fell, held to earth only by their strings. Lane 22 erupted. This truly is what sport is here to do. The drama, the emotion, this is the Aguero moment. What a finish, a strike in his last frame, who could ask for more.

It couldn't possibly happen again but yet the lane reordered itself in hope...in anticipation...the guard, the songs. Another confident stride. Another perfect release. Off she went again, and to those who were there, the scenes will forever last.

All. 10. pins. Another strike. Pandemonium. It was like a scene from Ancient Greece, even I was on my feet, who knew how hard it is to clap, sing and write prose simultaneously. A tenth frame turkey was on, this is what kids and adults alike dream of.

Once again, the lane reformed itself, this time calm in the certainty that all was well with the world, regardless of what happened next. Alas, Pins was denied his turkey, the cruel hand of fate. But nonetheless with that final ball, he wrapped up the night, the game, and his time in this league; claiming Top Pinsman, not just for Game 2, but one could say for all times.

And who can complain...What could be more human, but to achieve greatness, and not perfection?

Thank you Pins Magee for the memories, from all players and fans of PLB.

Until next time, this is Gutther Bawl signing off.